El Salvador, part 2

La Guitarra, our hostel of choice, claims they don’t have our rezzie for the beach front room (typical) and offers us a windowless cell for $25/night. Um, no. So we figure we’ll stay in a cheaper place for one night and come back tomorrow when our ocean front room will be available.

view we were hoping for…

Well turns out all of San Salvador arrives at the beach for the weekend, so hostels were pretty full. We mosey around for a bit (as casually as you can with 30 lbs strapped to your back) looking for 2 spare beds.

At La Sombra: “I can sleep outside on the hammock, and you two can have my bed,” was the  response we got from a hostel owner who only had one dorm bed available. He was going to give us his bed and sleep outside…For real? I don’t know if our experience was unique or pretty standard Salvadorian hospitality, but we encountered people and moments like these wherever we went. Mind = blown

We inquired at 3 different places before we found a spare room at Casa Makoi – owned by Pedro. Private with bath, $7/person. The tap water tasted like salt. No AC. And we loved every moment of it. So much so that we delayed arriving at our ocean front room an extra 3 days.

the perfect reading spot

the view from our balcony

hostel artwork

We tell Pedro we need to set up some surf lessons, to which he brings over their in house surf instructor Geremias, aka “Burro”. But I swear it was Adonis who strolled over – long, sun bleached waves billowing in the salty breeze, chiseled abs for days, arms that could easily pin me down, and glistening white teeth.

And then I hear God whisper “you’re welcome…”

I effing love Central America.

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Power

I’m walking through some pretty heavy stuff right now. Having good days and bad days. And I’m struggling with frustration, wanting to already be through and on the other side, instead of giving my Soul time to adjust and learn during this time. And then I read this:

Do not judge yourselves for not being where your soul knows you are going. It is important to move step by step. It is important to integrate every piece of your journey. What satisfaction would you have in going from having an empty jigsaw puzzle to a full jigsaw puzzle? Who does that? Those who do that do not get a great deal of satisfaction. The joy of a jigsaw is the piecing together so that you create the whole picture. And there is satisfaction when the whole picture is complete, yes, but the piecing…..that is the discovery. That is where the energy lies and it is the same for your lives.
~ Zachary through Lee Harris, from Personal Power
 
Helps keep perspective, and reminds me to be patient and gentle with myself. Always.
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Surfing in El Salvador

sin mar

con mar

Flying in, you see nothing but green, velvety hills of emerald. I imagined they would feel like moss if I touched them. But naturally I couldn’t, because my arms aren’t long enough.

a mountain!

I didn’t expect to fall in love with El Salvador, but it was immediate enchantment. Like a spell. The airport in San Salvador doesn’t even turn the lights on during the day! Bliss. There’s enough natural light filtering in through the windows, so there really is no need. For anyone who understands my allergy of fluorescent lighting, you can imagine how I was instantly endeared to all things Salvadorian from this point on.

From the airport, we get an offer to take us to El Tunco for $25 in a personal taxi, but it’s been 3 years since Marie and I were in Central America, and we want the chicken buses. We’re hard core, man. It’s not a real authentic experience unless you’re on a sweaty, overcrowded bus for 0.25.

pa’ la playa, senor

We first get dropped off at La Libertad, a heaving mix of loud music, people, food stands, colors and chaotic dirt roads. Central America in a nutshell, and I smile as if I’m home. I AM home. We weave through the people with our 30lb backpacks looking for the bus to El Tunco. “We are some crazy white girls,” Marie says, and I laugh. It’s been so long since I’ve done this, and it still feels right.

 3 hours later we arrive in El Tunco, exhausted, sweaty and starving. Ok. Maybe in our 30’s we no longer need the authentic experience. Especially since the airport is only 40 km from El Tunco.

sweet, wonderful cloudy El Tunco

All I care about is the sea. This is true at any given point in my life. We gravitate towards the beach, and throw down our packs and order a massive amount of beer and shrimp with rice.

rice with shrimps

Full and happy, time to go get settled in our ocean front room for the week…

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Rihanna’s Wisdom

I know, I know…a pop star saying something that resonates with me? But shame on me for judging. Wisdom can come from anywhere if you are open to receive it.

Rihanna has a tattoo on her collarbone that says “Never a failure, always a lesson”

I effing LOVE that. I feel like that one tiny statement is packed with so much power that it hits me like a punch in the face. As I’ve moved into a phase of being MUCH gentler with myself and my soul, I’ve learned that my mistakes are okay. Because I’m here to learn – not be perfect. So nothing I do is a failure, it’s just me learning. Because we don’t always know the right move…we’re just doing our best. And that’s ENOUGH. That’s always enough.

source

Tattoo is backwards so she can read it when she looks in the mirror.

(picture stolen from James Altucher’s site, one of my fave bloggers…he lives here)

Ri Ri doens’t stop there. I heard the song Fly during a Zumba class cool down a couple of months ago and the words were so true, so powerful, so me. I’m not here to live an ordinary life. I’m here to thrive, to fight, to soar, to fly. To rise and keep rising. And she gets it too.

“Fly”
(feat. Rihanna)

[Chorus: Rihanna]
I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise
To fly
To fly
 
[Nicki Minaj:]
I wish today it will rain all day
Maybe that will kinda make the pain go away
Trying to forgive you for abandoning me
Praying but I think I’m still an angel away
Angel away, yeah strange in a way
Maybe that is why I chase strangers away
They got their guns out aiming at me
But I become Neo when they’re aiming at me
Me, me, me against them
Me against enemies, me against friends
Somehow they both seem to become one
A sea full of sharks and they all smell blood
They start coming and I start rising
Must be surprising, I’m just summising
I win, thrive, soar, higher, higher, higher
More fire[Chorus: Rihanna]
I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise
To fly
To fly

[Nicki Minaj:]
Everybody wanna try to box me in
Suffocating every time it locks me in
Paint their own pictures then they crop me in
But I will remain where the top begins
Cause I am not a word, I am not a line
I am not a girl that can ever be defined
I am not fly, I am levitation
I represent an entire generation
I hear the criticism loud and clear
That is how I know that the time is near
So we become alive in a time of fear
And I ain’t got no motherfucking time to spare
Cry my eyes out for days upon days
Such a heavy burden placed upon me
But when you go hard your nay’s become yay’s
Yankee Stadium with Jay’s and Kanye’s

[Chorus: Rihanna]
I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise
To fly
To fly

[Bridge: Nicki Minaj]
Get ready for it
Get ready for it
Get ready for it
I came to win
Get ready for it
Get ready for it
Get ready for it
I came to win

[Chorus: Rihanna]
I came to win, to fight, to conquer, to thrive
I came to win, to survive, to prosper, to rise
To fly
To fly

 
Next week: How Katy Perry Inspired Me (she really did!)
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Witches Be Trippin’

“Hey, you look hot…do you want a beer? Or some water?”

I squint my eyes at the two ladies sitting nearby on the sand. I had come to the beach by myself with few supplies. I am hot, and would, in fact, love a beer.

I smile back at them. “That is so kind of you! Thanks!”

“Just bring your stuff over here by us!”

I grab my bag and drag my sarong over to where they are. They promptly pull out an ice cold Dos Equis, and hand me some lime juice and salt. This definitely isn’t their first rodeo, and I nod internally in approval.

We talk for a bit and I learn that they are old friends and live on the island. Their skin is a deep brown, and I can tell they spend most weekends here. Not a bad life. After a bit of chit chat I turn back to my book. (Shantaram – if you haven’t read it, stop everything you’re doing and buy it now.)

A few moments later, one asks me “Have you ever used orange liqueur?”

“I haven’t” I reply, shaking my head. “Is that a recipe book?” I point at the tiny book in her hands.

She gives me an odd look and shakes her head no. She holds the book up. The title reads: How To Cast Spells.

I was way off.

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=cartoon+witches&um=1&hl=en&safe=off&client=safari&sa=N&rls=en&biw=1279&bih=570&tbm=isch&tbnid=aTa8ou5MCwMx2M:&imgrefurl=http://www.how-to-draw-cartoons-online.com/cartoon-witch.html&docid=xIk9fySzV7yL-M&imgurl=http://www.how-to-draw-cartoons-online.com/image-files/cartoon_witch.gif&w=250&h=226&ei=rtQWUPe1DcfI0QHQhoHwCA&zoom=1&iact=rc&dur=406&sig=113199766689826322668&page=1&tbnh=161&tbnw=178&start=0&ndsp=12&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0,i:144&tx=98&ty=53

“Oh, are you a witch?” I ask, thinking there’s no way…

“Sort of.”

“Like…Wiccan??”

“Well…yeah. We both are.” And she points at the friend next to her who isn’t looking at me. No doubt they are either waiting for me to scamper away in fear or pull out my pitchfork.

Since I have insatiable curiosity, I do neither. I just keep asking questions. I mean, come on. Witches! I wasn’t going anywhere.

We launch into a discussion about their religion (it’s an earth religion with strong roots in Christianity – something I didn’t know) how they practice, what the purpose of a séance is and their first experiences with one, the details of their coven (they meet at The Witchery in Galveston, if you’re interested), the differences between white and black witches, and the purpose of casting spells.

I flip through their spell books and realize they are nothing more than affirmations, with a “light a candle” here or a “sprinkle some rose petals” there. But that’s pretty much it. I could totally be a witch.

“We’re white witches, so all of our spells are used for good. Attracting love, wealth, praying for protection against Satan…”

“Whoa whoa whoa. So you guys believe in Satan?” I’m baffled. These witches are teaching me so much.

“Oh, absolutely! You can’t have good without evil. Heaven without Hell. God without Satan.”

I interject: “So you believe in Heaven and Hell, too?”

“Yes of course! There has to be a Hell if there is a Satan.”

I shrug my shoulders. “That’s really interesting – I didn’t know you guys had so many parallels to Christianity. Personally, I don’t believe that a “Satan” exists, nor do I believe Hell exists.”

And they look at me like I just told them I drink blood on a daily basis.

“What? How could you even say that! You have to have the yin and yang of the Universe. That balance. You can’t have good without evil! Hell and Satan absolutely do exist. There is no other explanation.”

“Hey! I thought this was a safe place to share! Aren’t we all allowed to believe what we want?” And I laugh at the irony of witches telling me what I believe is wrong.

Regardless of our differences, they invited me to go to The Witchery with them, so I gave them my number. They’ve yet to contact me. :/

As I left to go back home, I said I wouldn’t be mad if they cast a few love spells in my direction every now and then, and we all had a good laugh. Those witches are alright.

Posted in My Life, random things | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Cumpleaños

I wanted a low key birthday since next weekend we are having a huge beach bash and things will inevitably turn into a shit show.

So I went to Zumba, got TWO iced coffees from Starbucks before 12, mani/pedis with the bestie, talked our way into the pool at Hotel Zaza, then fajitas and champers at the house. It was perfect.

You know what else is perfect? My gift:

well hello, unicorns!

what the WHAT? you’re actually chopsticks?

yesiree

Last week I told Mica that my vision had been cloudy, and I was worried cause that could only mean one thing: I have glaucoma. In her legendary sensitivity, she gives me the following birthday card:

to the beach we go!

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Dirty Thirty….ONE

I turn 31 on Saturday. I can’t believe I’m already one year deep into my 30’s. 30 has been pretty effing fantastic for me. I’m calmer, wiser, and funnier…and I traveled a ridiculous amount.

Here’s one thing I haven’t accomplished by 30: I still can’t take a sip of whiskey without cringing. And there is a part of me that will never feel like a true Southern woman until I can truly enjoy drinking whiskey or bourbon – this is my Everest.

Anywho, this year’s festivities will take place at the beach (must have water) and will be a dual celebration with a fellow Cancerian. I wanted to call it “A Mexican and A White Girl”, but when the invites were sent out, they didn’t reflect my suggestion. What cabrones.

In honor of my new decade, I want to recount the day upon whence (is that a word?) I entered this journey, since I never documented it on my blog. I had been living in Spain last year (yawn, I know you guys are so over me talking about Madrid) and arrived back home just in time for my anniversaire, (I speak French, too) and my bestie Mica had planned a surprise weekend getaway in Austin with all my homies. She’s the best.

Friday consisted of lunch and dinner with surprise guests, then a night of Noble Dog at One 2 One Bar:

Saturday = River Day

we’ve got our roadies – we’re ready

While we’re waiting for everyone in the Wal-Mart parking lot (“you can’t miss us – we’re the huge group with the white van and a bunch of unicorns”), I get my final surprise – CHARLIE

Prepare for a photo onslaught~

the unicorn provider

This is what we do while we wait on the group to get there…

gotta slap the bag when you’re done

Don’s Fish Camp:

“she can’t have gone too far – she has a unicorn strapped to her back”

Family photo…

…of epic awesomeness

everybody move to the back of the bus

then we got held up on the way out cause someone coming in broke their axle on the cattle guard.

por fin, el rio

river dog!

he walks on water, too

Shotgun Island

vampires?

things like this happen a lot towards the end

While writing this, I was listening to that Owl City song with Carly Rae (don’t judge) and it was actually quite fitting. If you would like the true experience, listen to the song below and read this post again – it’s pretty much our theme song to life

Posted in Austin, My Life, New Braunfels, Travel | Tagged , , , , , | 2 Comments

Acceptance

(Source)

This is my bread and butter, people. Turns out, I have problems accepting people for who they are. Ugh. There it is – my ugly side. I don’t accept you. Rawr.

Well…wait. If you’re awesome, and sarcastic, and open, and well-traveled, and intelligent, and goofy, and can dance like a mutha, then I totally accept you. If you love unicorns, we need go no further. You’re in.

But if you’re hard, inflexible, mean, judgmental, imposing, manipulative and negative – well, first I will want to change you, then when that doesn’t work, I will get mad for you not being like me, and I will want nothing to do with you.

This is a huge lesson for me right now. Huge.

And I’ll be damned if I haven’t stepped into a life with the most determined people to help me overcome this.

It’s just so exhausting. The resistance that comes with not accepting people for who they are. I’ve been resistant to so many things for so long and I’m done. I want to be like a river, and flow around my obstacles instead of senselessly beating my head against them, willing them to move out of my way. Cause it never works. Even for the strong-willed types like yours truly.

So what has to happen? I have to change. ME. It’s always me. Can’t it be them for once?

So I pull into myself for a moment and do a little self-examination (I love digging deep) and realize if I accept people for who they are, life is just so much easier.

So: I accept YOU. You never have to change.

But one more thing: I forgive myself. For not being accepting of you in the first place. Yep. That’s okay too.

I’m just gonna stay here and wiggle my toes in that forgiveness cause it feels gooooood.

Now, my perspective is different. I’m practicing acceptance. I’m moving into the attitude that it’s okay if you do this, or say that, or think this way. It’s allowed.

That’s my favorite thing to say: YOU’RE ALLOWED. You’re allowed to be happy. You’re allowed to be grumpy – even if that is your permanent demeanor. You’re allowed to think differently that me. You’re allowed. You’re allowed. You’re allowed.

And when I’m actively doing this I just feel so….free.

I’m going to let people be who they are. We are all allowed to be different. And because I want the freedom and acceptance to be who I am, I better make sure I’m practicing that with others.

The biggest thing for me to remember is that for me to be right in my perspective, the other person doesn’t have to be wrong. We are just different, that’s all. We are BOTH right.

Differences are what make the world spicy. I mean, how dull would it be if EVERYONE loved unicorns? They’d totally lose their appeal and I’d never give ’em a second glance. Oh that thought makes me so sad! I’m sorry Charlie! I will never abandon you.

So I’m going to allow you to be different, without being wrong.

It’s amazing how quickly this works too, cause I just started this practice a couple of weeks ago. Previously tense relationships have become easier, and I’m a lot more at ease. Not because they changed. Because I did.

It’s funny how a concept as simple as [lack of] acceptance can create entire shit storms of discontent, but when we finally give in, everything settles as if there was never a disruption in the first place.

So there you have it. I’m not going to change you. You are fine just as you are. I accept you.

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Surfing in El Salvador

In exactly ONE MONTH, I will be surfing here:

I will be reunited with my beloved Latin America after 3 long years!!! My heart lives there, you know. I could never get it to come back with me when I left South America in 2006. I think it was on to something…

I’m going to feel like I’m coming home. All I can picture right now is sitting on the beach, sand running through my fingers, and breathing in that sweet ocean scent that intoxicates me to my core.

I will laugh, I will cry, I will drink, I will eat pupusas, I will surf, I will learn El Salvadorian slang, I will avoid MS-13…and I will dance. Oh yes….I will dance.

And by the end of the week, I hope to shred like this:

Sharks not welcome.

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Lingering…

I wonder how you do this.

My heart expands and aches, all at once. You weave words in a way that pierces my soul with such intensity, and I am left burning, flames smoldering my breath and catching fire to every desire I have ever conjured for a man. Then the ashes blow in the wind, far away from me.

I reach out to grab onto something, but nothing is there.

My love, he is elusive. And the ache continues to grow until the monsters at my table scurry away in fear for the beast that it has become.

You.

You stir the quiet waters, and they awaken, and I open in places that before remain ignored.

Your words, vulnerable strings of music, they reach inside and throw open the hidden doors to the parts of me that few people can find.

I collapse into my own desires as I let you in.

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