Slang I Teach the Kids

Well the honeymoon phase is definitely over. Miguel the baby cries nonstop, which means I get an average of 4-5 hours of sleep per night. Cranky Pants. Both of us.

Pablo is still completely adorable and I find myself having to tell myself during class to not reach out and grab his cheeks. I just want ‘em so bad. It’s clear how much I love this kid as I just take photo after photo…

Jaime….joder. That kid is gonna send me to an early grave. Moody, distracted, whiny, funny…one minute he’s precious and sweet, the next can be a Chernobyl meltdown and he’s throwing a fit and sprawled out on the couch in a chaotic tumble of tears. I got so fed up one day I asked him if he wanted me to go get him a chupete (pacifier). He laughed. Not my intended reaction but I’ll take it. Now it’s a game with us. He whines – I ask about the chupete – he laughs – we begin class. This is the life I chose.

yes i make them take abnormal photos

So when I don’t feel like punching a baby or a small child, I’m working with Ignacio (12) and Alejandro (10), two delightful and sweet young boys who are a pleasure to be around. One of our favorite things to do in English class (and I say class loosely) is to listen to songs on youtube and have them try to decipher the lyrics. This is great fun for me because we like the same type of music (they want hip hop or Michael Jackson) and it’s great fun for them because they are learning a lot, but it doesn’t feel that way.

With songs we are destined to talk about slang. It’s pervasive in any culture, and increasingly evident to me as I go over these songs with them. Over the course of the past month, here is what I have taught the kiddos:

  • That’s how I roll
  • Tipsy
  • Imona make you beg for it (thank god they didn’t ask me what “it” was)
  • Ima
  • Blow my phone up
  • Swagger
  • Drop top
  • Blow my speakers up
  • Po Po’s
  • Drop the beat
  • Dude
  • Crunk
  • Designated driver
  • Hot mess
  • Pimp (I said it was someone who is “awesome”)
  • Hardcore

Here’s Alvaro. He’s 3, and I don’t teach him, but he always comes in to steal my water bottle. He’s HUGE. And beat me at arm wrestling.

Now, who wants me to watch their kids?

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